The Little Engine

There’s The Little Engine Who Could.

Then there’s The Little Engine Who Couldn’t.

And then there’s The Little Engine Who Did But No One Cared Enough To Watch.

Now you’re caught up on my day. Okay, okay, so I’m going to be a little whiny here. It’s my site so I do what I want. Actually, it’s very whiny. You don’t have to read this, I promise.

I’ve been struggling with health issues for years. Pure I-don’t-think-I-can-do-this-another-day sort of struggle. I’m finally starting to feel better and I finally feel like I’m moving forward with my life. I’ve finally broken free of the haze (at least for the most part) and I don’t want to waste anymore of my time. I want to accomplish something and make those around me proud of me.

I work about twelve to sixteen hours almost everyday to keep up with everything on my plate. I’ve been doing this for so long that I no longer remember when I started. Yet, it still doesn’t matter. I finally have something to show off and it goes unappreciated.

This is a lesson to me. An obvious lesson to some and most will preach it but not live by it. It’s time for me to look at what I’ve done through my own eyes, and not depend on others’ verification of my success. I know my struggle and I know how hard it was to get to where I am today.

That should be all that matters. My pride in myself should be enough to keep my fires fueled. I’ll have to make it enough.

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